The Role of Fathers
By
Shelby G. Floyd
July 23, 2006
“Fathers, do not provoke your
children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the
Lord.” (Ephesians 6: 4.)
The Domestic Duties of the
Fathers
Concerning the domestic duties of the home, the apostle Paul said to the Ephesians, “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” (Ephesians 6: 4.) In the previous verses, the apostle had instructed the children to be in submission and obedience to their parents; but in the text under consideration, the fathers are commanded to be firm, yet gentle to their children, for he says, “fathers, provoke not your children to wrath.” The word provoke conveys the meaning of “to arouse to wrath, to provoke, to exasperate, to irritate and to anger.” Paul warns the fathers against being overly strict and oppressive, and thereby breaking the spirit of the child. This does not mean that the fathers should never cross the wishes of the child, but it does mean that they should be firm, yet kind.
Fathers Should Not Provoke
Their Children to Anger
Fathers should not provoke their children to wrath because this will cause them to be disheartened and unruly: “Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.” (Colossians 3: 21.) In our day, the danger seems to be to the other extreme, that of overindulgence and tolerance and a lack of training the children by the parents. Therefore, in contrast to the fathers provoking the children to wrath, Paul says, “…but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.” To bring up a child, simply means to educate and nurture and train the child; it conveys the idea of nourishment.
Fathers
Should Bring Up Their Children in the Lord
In bringing up a child, the fathers not only have the responsibility of providing physical nourishment for the child’s body, but also mental and. spiritual nourishment for the child’s mind and soul. To bring up a child in the nurture and admonition of the Lord involves a conscious plan of training and education. Paul instructed the fathers to bring the children up in “the nurture of the Lord.” The original word for nurture has been defined:
“The whole training and education of children (which relates to the cultivation of mind and morals, and employs for this purpose now commands and admonitions, now reproof and punishment): it includes also the care and training of the body.)” --Thayer, page 473.
Fathers
Are the Primary Breadwinners
Fathers are responsible for providing the physical needs of their children. The wise man in the Old Testament said, “A good man leaves an inheritance to his children's children, but the sinner's wealth is laid up for the righteous.” (Proverbs 13: 22.) According to the instructions of an inspired man, “if any man will not provide for his own, and especially for those of his own household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an infidel.” (1 Timothy 5: 8.) It is good for parents to help their children financially, for the children ought not to lay up for the parents, but the parents for the children. (2 Corinthians 12: l4.) While this is one of the duties incumbent upon the fathers, it is not the most important duty.
In the
whole training and education of a child, the fathers are also responsible for
the care and training of the body. Therefore, recreation is the responsibility
of the parents and not the church. Recreation and the training of the physical
body is an important duty but not as important as the training of the spirit, “for
while bodily training is of some value, godliness is of value in every way, as
it holds promise for the present life and also for the life to come.” (1 Timothy 4:8.)
Fathers
Must Correct and Discipline Their Children
Beyond
these duties the fathers have the obligation to discipline their children.
Solomon, the sage of
The
Admonition of the Lord
The fathers are also commanded to bring up their children in the “admonition of the lord.” This simply means they are to bring them up according to the teaching of the will of God. A child cannot obey his parents “in the Lord” unless the parents teach him or bring him up in “the admonition of the Lord.” Fathers, therefore, are responsible for seeing that their children are taught the word of God. This includes instruction in the home as well as in the Bible classes of the church. Wise fathers will see to it that their children are present at every Bible class of the church. In the teaching of Moses in the law, fathers were responsible for teaching their children the word of God. (Deuteronomy 11:18-21.) Abraham was commended by God because he would command his children in the way that they should go. (Genesis 18: 19.)
Fathers
Have A Multitask Role
A careful examination of the scriptures relative to the duties of the fathers will reveal that fathers should pity their children (Psalms 103: 13); correct their children (Proverbs 3: 12): chasten their children (Proverbs 13: 24); leave them an inheritance (Proverbs 13: 22); train them (Proverbs 22: 6); make them wise (Proverbs 27: 11; 29: 17); make known unto them God’s truth (Isaiah 38: 1); love them (Matthew 10: 37); provide for them (Luke 11: 11-13); exhort and comfort them (1 Thessalonians 2: 11); rule them and keep them in subjection (1Timothy 3:4; 3: 12); and rear them in such a way that they will be faithful children. (Titus 1: 6.)
Well
Trained Children Will Not Depart From the
Let all parents take
seriously the training of our children in the Lord. Let us realize that if we “Train
up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old, he will not depart
from it.” (Proverbs 22: 6.) Children who have been trained up in
the way they should go will be godly children, and they will bring glory and
honor to their parents. (Psalms 144: 12; Proverbs 17: 6.) May we as parents
instruct and rule our families in such away that the God of all families and
the Father who is the archetype of all fathers will approve of our ways.
(Jeremiah 31:1; Ephesians 3:14-15.) Copyright
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